I've Been a M*ffdiver for Many a Year

Well I've been a m*ff diver for many a year, I've spent all my money on m*ff divin' gear, From goggles to flippers and oxygen tank, If I can't have a m*ff dive I'll just have a w*nk, And it's Motherwell, Motherwell F.C., Is by far the greatest team the World has ever seen...